Accidental Friendship
When I don’t know someone well our conversation feels polite but awkward. I keep the conversation shallow and safe. However, for a friendship to deepen, communication must also deepen. As a friendship grows, and we begin to share our thoughts and emotions, a beautiful thing transpires. We begin to trust one another. As trust deepens, our communication deepens as well, and the depth of the friendship follows suit.
When I first began writing this series of blog posts on Ezekiel 36:26-28 it became apparent that we are powerless to replace our own hearts of stone with a heart of flesh. However, we can take intentional steps to place ourselves in proper alignment to receive the heart replacement He offers. We can listen instead of simply hearing, as we discussed last week in my blog post entitled I Hear You.
We can also cultivate communication with Him. Few worthwhile things happen by accident. Just as cultivating deep friendships requires intentionality, the same applies to our relationship with God. It will not happen by accident—it must be cultivated.
The success or failure of any relationship rises or falls upon its level of healthy communication. When a friendship begins, surface-level conversation is expected. However, the friendship will not deepen if the conversation remains surface-level. As the friendship grows, conversation comes easily, becoming effortless over time. As friendship blossoms, we frequently lose track of time as we converse. In time, we seek out our friends’ company because our conversation is enjoyable.
When God and I first began together, my prayers often felt awkward, like surface-level conversation with someone I didn’t truly know. It stayed safe and liberally sprinkled with churchy phrases. The conversation felt guarded. Could I trust Him? I’d heard that He is abounding in lovingkindness, and overflowing with mercy and grace, but resting my full weight upon something I read in a book seemed risky--even if that book happened to be the Bible.
The change began as I took the risk of trusting what He said in Scripture, and began to place my full weight upon His written word in small ways. I discovered, through experience that what I read in the Bible was all true; I could rest my full weight upon it. When I began to find Him trustworthy in small ways, my confidence in Him grew stronger. Since I could trust Him in small ways, I could also trust Him in deeper ways. I found the depth of our relationship hinged upon my level of trust in Him.
What does all this talk of cultivating communication and trust with God have to do with the process of replacing our heart of stone with a heart of flesh? Since our heart replacement happens within the context of our relationship with Him, it has everything to do with it. Our relationship with Him will not happen by accident; it requires intentional steps. First among those intentional steps is cultivating strong communication with Him. We accomplish this through reading Scripture, and listening to sound teaching. We take further steps by processing what we read and hear through journaling, and taking action based upon what He says.
As Christians, we all desire a deep and vibrant prayer life that fuels our relationship with depth and strength. We long to be engaged in a captivating relationship with the Ancient of Days, and wonder if it is even possible. I contend that it is completely possible, and it begins with cultivating communication with Him and taking the risk of trusting what He said in Scripture. As our relationship grows, our trust in Him will deepen as well, and our hearts will echo the psalmists:
“As the deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?” (Psalm 42:1-2)